


How to Catch/Train Demons: Snake Charming

by Athree_V



Series: How to Catch/Train your Demons [2]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Angst, Comedy, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Friendship/Love, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Multi, Other, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Self-Indulgent, Spoilers, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:28:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24242818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Athree_V/pseuds/Athree_V
Summary: The Seven Deadly sins think they know it all, having lived so long, they probably do, but they have never had an opinionated lady living with them. With literature, anime and meme references scattered throughout this long, cute and annoying text; will this thick-headed lady survive her year in the Devildom? Or will she manage to train the sins? Only one way to find out.In this Edition, Valentina learns the power of a Pact.
Relationships: Asmodeus (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Beelzebub (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Belphegor (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Leviathan (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Lucifer (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s), Satan (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: How to Catch/Train your Demons [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1745887
Kudos: 18





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The main reason I wrote this is because I needed to tell off Lucifer ( I not so secretly love him though). I also thought it would be fun to make a character, not based on me, but with a similar cultural background, to give the boys culture shock.  
> I had a lot of support. Thanks to this amazing supportive fandom.  
> I hope you have fun and think I am as funny as I think I am.  
> Its all for lols and funs.  
> I will finish uploading the main story chapters and then I will upload the smuts. I wanted to establish my MC as a character before getting to my porn with plot. I will be using the same MC for everything. I take suggestion for which smut to post first.  
> Each part will have 5 chapters for symmetry  
> This is not original, all the characters belong to Solmare, except my MC, Valentina (Vee).

Part 2: Snake Charming 

Chapter 1: Dealing with the Pact  
I went to my classroom and I heard two demons gossiping questioning why would Mammon form a pact with an ‘ordinary human’.  
I mean, as long as they don’t talk shit about Mammon… and that got me wondering, yet again, why I gave a damn. It had to be the pact.  
A demon walked over to me, he had dark hair that faded into a pretty mint color. “Huh. Whenever you make an important announcement; the demons here couldn’t care less. But rumors… they really do spread like wildfire. Just when I thought the uproar about the new exchange student from the human world has started to subside some, now they’re all freaking out about this. “  
Diavolo looked at him disappointed, “Come now, don’t say that, Barbatos. Actually, I’d say that all the gossip is a good thing. It means that everyone will be watching this human, which makes it hard for any demon to go after Valentina’s soul when no one is looking. “  
“Thanks for the vote of confidence…” I mumbled.  
“Yes. Since Mammon’s not doing a very good job as a guardian. I told him he was to look after Valentina, but he’s off somewhere shirking his responsibility. Though I figured this would happen.” Lucifer said clearly annoyed.  
Diavolo smiled at me, “I must say, I can’t believe you managed to forge a pact with Mammon, Valentina. That’s no small feat. And what’s more, you did in such a short time.  
The man with the pretty hair smiled… Barbatos, was what Diavolo called him. “I suppose it stands as proof that you chose well bringing this human here, Lord Diavolo.”  
I smiled, “Nice to meet you.” Introductions were in order.  
“Ah yes, pardon me. I suppose we haven’t met before, have we? My name is Barbatos. I apologize for not introducing myself sooner. I have the honor of serving as steward to Lord Diavolo. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”  
I was still in awe of his ombre hair… I was always into that type of look.  
“Barbatos here is a smart and talented individual, so much so that I wish I could trade a certain idiot brother of mine for him instead.” Lucifer said with a frown.  
Barbatos had no emotion in his face, I couldn’t read him, “Well, as for your brother, in the human world, it is sometimes said that a truly wise man does not flaunt his talents. He keeps them secret.”  
“If we are talking about Mammon, then he keeps them hidden, very, very very deep.”  
“Yes, but then again, an incompetent fool doesn’t actually have any talents to begin with.” Lucifer said sternly.  
Diavolo laughed, “Well, I’ve heard it said that the most think-headed child is always the cutest.”  
Lucifer frowned, “Stop it, Diavolo. It’s troublesome enough having him as my younger brother. But my child? Him? I don’t even what to think about it.”  
Another man with dark skin walked up to use, he had black hair and light eyes and was not wearing an uniform, “Ah, but I notice that you didn’t deny the part about him being cute, did you? If I might offer my own opinion, out of you seven brothers, you’re without a doubt the most troublesome, Lucifer.”  
Lucifer glared at him, “Is that meant as a compliment, Simeon?”  
A cute little boy came up from behind the man, Simeone he had a white outfit and a hat. ”Pff, of course not! Duh! That was a putdown! An insult! He’s taunting you?!  
Lucifer looked down at the child dismissingly, “Ah, I see you’ve brought your chihuahua along with you.”  
The boy had his hands in fists, “I am NOT a chihuahua! How many times do I have to tell you that, demon!”  
Lucifer smiled, I couldn’t tell if it was a sadistic smile or a mischievous one, either way he was enjoying taunting the boy, “Well, what do you expect? I am a demon, after all. Now then stop yipping at me. C’mere boy… shake! Who’s a good boy?”  
I was gawking at Lucifer, that was so fucking rude!  
The boy was obviously upset. “Quit it! Don’t you make fun of me! And don’t tell me to shake! I’m not a dog!”  
Diavolo smiled, “Allow me to introduce you, Valentina. This is Simeon. He’s an exchange student from the Celestial Realm. Which is to say, he’s an angel.” He began signaling to the man with the dark skin.  
The man gave me a kind smile, “Well, hello, Valentina. I ‘ve heard a lot of rumors!”  
“I hope all good!” I said with a smile.  
“I don’t know if you would necessarily classify them as good.” Simeon said with an unwavering smile.  
“Ah, but you have heard of me.” I said smiling, proud of myself for using that Pirates of the Caribbean quote.  
Then Diavolo gestured to the boy, “and this is Luke. Let’s see, you’re… a chihuahua, was it? Or are you an angel?”  
That frustrated Luke, “Wh…! Diavolo, now YOU’RE getting in on the act, too?! I am NOT a chihuahua! I am an angel!” Luke tuned to me, “Listen up! As you can probably tell, I’m a low-ranking angel. BUT I’ll have you know that in the Celestial Realm I report directly to Michael the Archangel, as-“  
Simeon cut him off, “Luke, calm down. You need to learn not to make such a huge fuss about everything.”  
Luke pouted, “But Simeon!”  
Lucifer smiled again, “he’s right. That’s exactly why people call you a chihuahua, you know?”  
“Usually the only one who calls me a chihuahua is YOU, Lucifer!” Luke snapped.  
Barbatos cut in, “It’s nearly time for the first bell to sound.”  
Simeon smiled, “yes, you’re right. I apologize for the trouble we’ve caused you, Valentina”  
“Oh no, don’t worry. No trouble at all. I mean, I am currently living with the seven deadly sins. THAT’S trouble.” I replied with a smile and acting as if Lucifer wasn’t standing right there.  
That gained me a chuckle from Simeon, Barbatos and Diavolo.  
I didn’t even look at Lucifer who was probably glaring at me.  
Diavolo smiled at me, “In any event, I’m relieved to see that things seem to be going well for you here.”  
Lucifer looked at me with a smile, that I found kind of evil, “Valentina, look after Mammon for me, would you?”  
“As I remember it, Mammon was supposed to be the one looking after, Valentina, correct?” Barbatos asked puzzled.  
Lucifer gave him a devious grin, “Yes, that’s how I remember it as well. Your point?”  
They all walk away, except Luke. He said something I couldn’t understand and I got down to hear him better. “Sorry, what did you say?”  
Luke got flustered, “Hey! Don’t lean down towards me like an adult listening to a child! You don’t need to come down to my level! I’m not a kid!”  
I gave him an apologetic smile, “I’m sorry, I really didn’t hear you, so I got closer to hear. It isn’t that I’m treating you like a child. Its for my benefit.” I replied trying to calm the little angel.  
“Never trust a demon. Especially when that demon is Lucifer.”  
“Noted.” I replied.  
“Listen to me. He’s a monster and a brute. He’s uncivilized. Immoral, and…and also...”  
“And also a sadist?” I offered.  
“Yes, exactly! He’s the most sadistic of sadist” Luke said.  
“I have noticed, he gives of that vibe, you know?” I agreed.  
“I was against this from the beginning. What are they thinking, bringing humans to the Devildom as exchange students. So, you’ve been warned. You get what I’m saying right?”  
I gave him a reassuring smile, “Thank you for the warning Luke.” I gave a fake sigh, “Gosh, it’s like having a guardian angel and I will take your warning very seriously. I will be careful.”  
That earned me another cute blush, “Um.. Good! Take it seriously. And don’t call me that!”  
My smile didn’t falter. The first bell rang.  
“Bye, Luke it was so nice meeting you and thank you.” I told him and went to take my seat.


	2. Ode to Goldie (skippable but fun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tittle legit says it all.

After the lunch break I had a class with Mammon and Leviathan. I made a point to be there a few minutes early and the classroom was empty, a few minutes later Mammon came in and sat next to me, yet ignored me.  
Then he pulled out his credit card and started talking to it as if it were a long lost lover. “I’ve neem waiting for this day for so, so long…. I’ve dreamed of this so many times I can’t even count. All this time we’ve been apart, I’ve never stopped thinkin’ about you.” Then the man blushed, “You’ve really got me wrapped around your finger, ya know that? I thought I was strong, but I can’t resist you, no matter how hard I try. I never thought I’d see the day when anyone could do this this to me. I’ve fallen so hard for you. I hope you knew what you were doing when you cast this spell on me, because I’m yours now, and there’s no going back.” Then he screamed “Oh credit card…. CREDIT CARD, BABY…! I MISSED YOU SO SO SO MUCH!” Then he started speaking adoringly again, “and now you’ve finally come back to me! I was so worried… Ya don’t even know. Did that bastard Lucifer mistreat you? To think he went and stuck you in the freezer- the freezer! You must’ve been so cold, so lonely, so sad… Oh you poor poor baby. I wuv you so much! You’re back here with me now, safe and sound. So don’t you worry, ‘cause I’m going to treat ya right, Goldie. We’re gonna be so, so happy together, you’ll see! We’ll shop together and visit ATMS together. We’ll do it over and over and over until you’re completely maxed out!”  
I sat there staring at him in utter disbelief, confusion and concern as he went on his monologue. My mouth was probably opened too. Was he talking about sex or spending, I was confused and concerned.   
Mammon finally saw me gawking. “Wait a minute, what is it human?” I lifted my index finger lecturing, for calling me human, “ Valentina?” good, he was learning “You look like you want to say something? Go on, whatever it is, say it, because I’m in such an incredibly goof mood right now. I’d be willing to answer a question for you, depending on what it is.”  
“You are weirding me out… I am concerned.” I replied.   
“Fine. Be weirded out, then. It doesn’t bother me. I don’t even care! As long as I’ve got my baby Goldie here with me, that’s all I need.” Mammon replied.   
“Are you missing a few brain cells?” I asked in utter disbelief.   
“Hey, shut up. Also, I am rubber, you are glue! Boom! Now YOU’RE the one who’s stupid! Anyone who dares make fun of Goldie is gonna end up regrettin’ it In the end, ‘cause she’s my baby! Just you remember that!  
“WOW… Just WOW, You are so in love… with a piece of plastic…”  
“Of course I am… wahddya expect?! There are two things on this universe that I love more than anything else. Money. And my sweet baby Goldie. I mean the way it feels when I touch her… I can’t even explain it! Every time I take her out of my wallet, I get goosebumps.”  
I cringed and pulled out my D.D.D. as he talked and sent a text to Lucifer, ‘Hey, Lucifer’ ‘Are there like psychologist or Psyquiatrist in the Devildom?’  
“What will you spend all that money on?” I mused.  
Mammon looked at me disappointed. “Hey, whoa…wait a minute. Human, don’t tell me ya actually think that… oh, I don’t believe this. You actually think I spent all that money on stuff for myself? Buying the newest model U-Pad, the latest Versucci jacket.”   
I nodded and saw the reply from Lucifer, ‘Has the Devildom finally broken you? It’s a little too soon for that.’  
Mammon continued talking, “Well, you’ve got it wrong, human! Just shows how shallow you are! Now, you sit yourself down right there and listen. Actually , don’t sit, kneel. You know what? Don’t kneel, prostrate yourself . On the floor with ya!”  
I replied to the text, ‘It isn’t for me!’ , ‘Why do you assume so much? It’s annoying as fuck’, ‘Anyways, you told me to take care of Mammon and I am really concerned here. He has spent a good ten minutes talking to his credit card as if wits a long-lost love, as in a person and he gave a full Shakespearian soliloquy professing his love. In a classroom. I am concerned to say the least.’  
“ It’s time you found out exactly how magnanimous I can be. Listen and learn” That is a big word, which I was surprised Mammon knew. “So, there’s this girl I met once in the human world.” I saw Leviathan come in and seat like right in next to Mammon, but Mammon’s attention was on me. “And when I say girl, I mean little girl. She’s only nine years old. But ever since the day she was born, she’s been stuck in a bed.” How did he meet her then? I doubt he did charity visits to a hospital. “You see, she ain’t well. It’s a serious , long-term sorta situation. She needs surgery, but she ain’t got the money for it, and she ain’t got family to look after her either. At this rate, all she can do is wait for death to come.”  
I texted Levi, ‘Don’t let him know you are here yet, I want to see how far the bullshit goes.’  
“So, I got to thinkin’…. I want to do whatever I can do to help her. “Mammon was even blushing, “I know that’s not a very me thing to think, but it’s true”  
Leviathan gave me a nod in agreement, he messed with his D.D.D. and set it down, was he recording?   
I got a reply from Lucifer, ‘We do have Freud in one of the other levels, perhaps some time with him, will help Mammon deal with his… traumas’  
“Still, the fact is that I’m a demon. I can’t very well be caught actin’ like an angel, ya know?”  
I replied to Lucifer, first with the laughing demon and then as I listened, I was more worried, ‘you better get the straight jacket because he said he is magnanimous, and he helps sick human children. I am a really worried, here.’   
“So, I sent her all sorts of stuff. And I did it Anonymously, so no one would know it was me.” Mammon finally finished the sob story.   
“Like the latest Versucci jacket?” I offered.  
That got him stuttering, “Ah…um, well … you know, I thought she could wear it over her pajamas to stay warm. Sorta like a sweater and it’s not like I know what sorta things kids like, right? I just bought what I thought might be good… and that happened to be a men’s Versucci jacket.”  
“and I imagine you were also, oh so generous enough to get her the newest model U-Pad?”  
“Y-yeah, that’s right, because that’s what she said she wanted, okay? You got a problem with that? Life in the hospital is boring. She needs gadgets like that to keep her occupied.” Mammon replied.   
“So, like, the dying nine year old wanted an I-Pad?” the human world had I pads, not U-pads…  
“Y-y-yeah, exactly. She wanted it okay?” Mammon replied.   
“That is actually so sweet, if my heart wasn’t frozen, I might actually cry.” I said sarcastically.   
Mammon thought I was being serious. “I know, right? Right? I AM sweet, aren’t I? Seriously, I almost make MYSELF wanna cry. You humans have a word for this sorta thing, right? An “anonymous angel,” that’s what I am. Though I guess in my case I’m actually an “anonymous devil”, huh? So, NOW you get it, don’t you? You understand what a great guy I am.”  
“Wow, Mammon, I would have never thought.” I said, exaggerating my shock.   
“Anyways, that’s what I’ve been keepin’ from ya.” He replied.   
“I really miss judged you!” I said, trying to sound in awe.   
“Yep, exactly. Everyone’s always talking about what a scumbag I am, but not as scummy as they make me out to be. That’s all I’m sayin’” Mammon replied.   
“Do the others know about you outstanding kindness?” I asked with fake concern.   
“Oh no, there’s no way I could tell them. They wouldn’t believe it anyways. They’d just make fun of me and said I wasn’t the sort to do that kind of stuff. Anyway, it’s not like I’m doing it ‘cause I want recognition. So, it’s fine with me if they don’t know.”  
I sent another text to Levi, ‘Send help. Drowning in bullshit.’  
“Is that REALLY what you did with your money?” I said, to give him a chance to come clean.   
“HEY COME ON! No fair! Don’t give me that you’re-so-terrible-and-I don’t-trust-you-look! Eh, whatever. I guess it doesn’t matter whether you believe me or not.  
Leviathan had moved to seat in front of Mammon, “There you go lying again.”  
Mammon screamed. “Hey, what’s the big idea?! Don’t sneak up behind me like that!”   
“Mammon, for fucks sake, he has been here like the whole time!” I exclaimed.   
“Well, I wouldn’t have if you weren’t such a liar. I have to say, I’m impressed. That was quite a story. Lying really does come naturally to you, doesn’t it Mammon?” Leviathan was lecturing.   
“I’m not lying! It’s the truth!” Mammon exclaimed.   
“Oh yes you are. You can’t fool me. I know what happened, Mammon. I know that ten witches were fighting over who got to make a pact with you. So, Lucifer persuaded them to cut you into ten pieces and divide you amongst themselves. He planted the idea by making it appear in the tea leaves when they were doing their divination.”  
“Damn, Lucifer Is ruthless.” I commented.  
“HEY! Who told you about that?! Also, there WEREN’T Ten witches! There were just three! Three witches were pressuring me for a pact! Get it right!” Mammon snapped,  
Levi sighed exasperated “What does it even matter? Whether they split you into tenths or thirds, It’s all the same.”  
“Oh no it’s not! Cutting me into tenths would be way different. The pieces would be small and stuff! Wait though… You’re telling me it was LUCIFER who gave them the idea to chop me up like that?!”  
The way he said that made me chuckle.  
“Anyway Mammon, somehow you managed to wiggle your way out of making a pact with them, but they’re still the boss of you. The truth is that those three witches still have you under their thumb. They make you buy things for them, don’t day? They use you as their own personal piggy bank.” Leviathan continued.   
“Wha? That’s crazy. Just who do you think you’re talkin’ to? I’m Mammon, the one and only Avatar of Greed. You think someone’s using ME to buy the, stuff? As if I’d ever let some puny witches tell me what to do! Pff, don’t make me laugh. In fact, you could say they’re the ones serving me, not the other way around-“ Mammon’s rant was cut off by his D.D.D. ringing. “Hold on. Ugh… I was just getting to the good part! Whoever this is, they’ve got a lot of nerve to interrup-“ He saw the caller ID and gulped loudly.   
Mammon’s expression fell.   
“You know your phone ringing, Mammon. Aren’t you going to answer it”. Leviathan said.  
“Sh-Shut up, Levi! O-Of course I’m gonna answer it!” Mammon answered, “Um, Hello?... It’s me…. Oh, right… sorry. I mean, yes, it’s me. It’s Mammon…Hm? You want me to come to the club? Right now? In a limousine?... Hold on a second. There’s no way I’ll be able to find a limousine on such short notice… “just shut up and do it!”…. Come on, it’s straight-up impossible. I need more time to-… R-Right! Understood! I’ll be there in ten minutes… I promise! Just sit tight, okay? … I mean, please wait there for me… If you would be so kind… ma’am!”  
“… Mammon. Who was that on the phone?” Levi asked.   
“OH NO! Something’s wrong with my hearing! Suddenly I can’t hear anything!” Mammon said.   
I rolled my eyes.   
Levi laughed and echoed my thoughts, “That was the witches just now, wasn’t it Mammon?”  
Mammon’s face fell, “Ugh, I’ve had it with this. I mean what’s WRONG with them?! How long are they planning on usin’ me as their slave?!” Mammon looked at his brother, “You know somethin’? Women are scary Real scary!!”  
“Are you trying to tell me something, Mammon?” I asked with an edge to my voice.   
“Well, that settles it. I’m definitely sticking with two-dimensional girls.” Leviathan said with a smile on his face.   
“I feel you there, 100%.” I said.   
Both men gave me concerned looks.   
“What?” I asked.   
“You are a lesbian, that explains everything!” Mammon exclaimed.   
I giggled, “No, wow, I can’t believe this, coming from demons. I am not ‘a lesbian’, but I am not heterosexual either. Regardless I don’t care about defining myself; but, I am going to let you guys figure it out. Anyways, I agree with Levi, ‘cause you know, 2D is better, all the love and zero drama.”  
“Maybe you are not so bade for a normie.” Leviathan mussed.   
“Mammon, you are running late to meet your lady friends.” I asked.  
“Shit!” Mammon exclaimed and practically went out of the classroom. 

That night I laid on my bed turning over what Luke said. Yes, I was faking it, I had to pretend to be over exited, because, he looks like a child. Bad on me, he’s probably a gazillion years old. But really thinking about it, why did he take the time to give me a warning like that?   
Then I heard a voice, I heard it once, twice, and third. I could not make out what it was saying. The fourth time I head it, “help. Someone help me..”  
I left my room, following pleads for help.   
“help…Over here!”  
I got to some stairs I had not seen before and bumped right into Lucifer.   
If I was not the sexuality that I was, this would have probably been the sexiest thing of my lifetime.   
“Valentina!” he said.  
I went around him to go up the stairs.   
Lucifer grabbed my arm, but not roughly. He was frowning, “Stop right there. You’ll go no farther…that’s not a place for humans. It’s dangerous.” Then he gave me a stern look, “Go back to your room.”  
“No.” I said sternly.   
He was shocked for a moment and then he laughed, “interesting. I think I’m starting to see why you were chosen to come her. But you can’t say no. Because I am not giving you a choice.”  
I didn’t move and was looking at him sternly.   
“Now then, back to your room. If you value your life, you’ll do as I say.” Lucifer said sternly.   
“You make a lot of threats against my life for someone who is interested in me surviving my year here.” I replied curtly.   
His grip on my arm got tighter, “This is the Devildom. There are certain rules that must be followed here. Also, my word is law to you. You can’t defy me… Now then, go on. Back to your room.”  
I sighed, I hadn’t been here a full month yet and I am being a cunt to the infamous Lucifer, really I was usually a cunt to him. I really needed to chill, but I also was not fond of being told what to do or to threats. “Well, someone should certainly take the time to teach me Da Rules, so that I don’t fuck up.” I immediately thought of ‘Da Rules’ from Fairly Odd Parents… I wanted to make a sexual joke about his word being law, but I didn’t think that Lucifer was the demon to mess with. But I went with the next best thing. “Are you going to instruct me?” I said in the most flirtatious tone I could muster.   
Lucifer nodded and let go of my arm, “You are correct. We should discuss the rules for your stay. However, it is past curfew and you are aware of this by now. So, that will be a lesson for another time. For the time being, return to your room. This is the fourth time I tell you and I will not tell you again.”  
I raised my arms in defeat, “Yes, Lucifer, Sir” then because I had a death wish, I did the Nazi salute and ran to my room before waiting for his reaction. He followed making sure I was in my room, when he saw that I was a t the door, he left me alone.   
I returned to my bedroom puzzling over what had just happened. Along with Luke’s words.


	3. Do You Know Otaku?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this edition, Valentina stirs the Avatar of Envy.

As the weeks passed, my insomnia was not getting better. I would do my homework and go to the library. Luckily, Satan was at least willing to give me book suggestions, even if I took them to my room and read until dinner time. Either that or I would go to the music room and sat at the piano. I also found it quite difficult to be on kitchen duty. Feeding 6 demons, specially when one of them ate 3 to 5 times what the others ate. I also managed to get a part time job. Which was great and Devildom seemed to be efficient about paying after the shift.   
Yet again, I found myself unable to sleep and I was strolling along the halls of the House of Lamentation and my tiered mind took me to those accursed attic stairs.   
Lo and behold, Lucifer was descending them. “What’s going on, Valentina? Out on a stroll?” There was nothing I could possibly answer to that. He smiled, “I keep running into you here, don’t I? It seems you are really curious about what’s at the top of this staircase.” Then his eyes narrowed dangerously, “Unless I’m mistaken, I believe I told you that it’s not a place human have any business going.”  
I grimaced, “Ah, I’m sorry Lucifer. I… I can’t sleep. As usual and I was just walking around aimlessly…”  
His expression relaxed, “If you can’t sleep, perhaps I should make you some tea? Something that will help you have a good night’s sleep.”  
I smiled up at him, “That is the nicest thing you have said to me.”  
“You should probably know that it’s a bit too effective on humans, to the point that you may find that you never wake up again.” He spoke sternly.   
I sighed, “Of course.”  
Lucifer’s face was an emotionless mask, “You get what I’m saying here, right? Go back to your room.”  
I glared at him. That made him smile, “Good night, Valentina.”  
“Oh, what’s that, Lord Diavolo? Yeah, I am loving my time here, where the one and only Lucifer makes threatens at every opportunity.” I said sarcastically as I walked away. His attitude only made me want to go up the stairs more. No longer about my curiosity, but about him, what was he hiding? Why was he such a dick about it? I imagined a torture room or something of the sorts.   
The next morning, I was exhausted, but I had read most of a book Satan had recommended. At least one of these demons had decent taste.   
Mammon sighed, “Why do I gotta be stuck here with you first thing in the morning having to look at your face while I’m tryin’ to eat my breakfast. To us demons, eating a human like you is a special sorta treat, understand? Yet I’m not allowed to do that. I’ve gotta sit here and eat my breakfast instead.”  
I smiled deviously, “Well, Mammon, I don’t think we know each other well enough to let you eat me. Maybe if you buy me dinner first, I might consider it.”  
Mammon looked disgusted, which is totally what I was going for. “Gross, I don’t mean like that, ya’ dumb human. I mean, it’s like havin’ a premium-grade roast Iriomote musk hug right in front of me. Medium Rare, cooked to perfection. But I can’t have it . Instead I’m sitting here eatin’ dried blackbelly newt legs. I mean, I’m not sayin’ blackbelly newt legs are bad. I actually like ‘em but still”  
“Damn, Mammon, I didn’t know I made you feel that way.” I gave an exaggerated sigh, “I mean, maybe we should just get to know each other better.” I said in the most flirtatious tone I could muster.   
Mammon just grunted and ignored my comment as he kept ranting, “And what’s even worse is that thick juicy hunk of meat has started giving me orders now, like it’s the boss of me or somethin’”  
I fanned myself, “Damn, is it hot in here or is it just me. I think it’s just me.” I was being obnoxious and annoying, but I was not going to be treated like food either.   
“It’s REALLY not fun. I mean, what sick kind of torture is this, anyway?!”  
“Oh Mammon, Corazon, I thought you enjoyed being dominated.” I said.   
He scoffed.  
“Where are the others?” I asked.   
“Hell if I care about the goody-two-shoes, Asmo was probably up all night, he’s a real playboy that one and Beel, speakin’ of him, he went and ate the custard I left in the refrigerator-the one I was saving for later! I told him NOT to eat anything that had my name on it! Ugh, I’m gonna kill him!”  
I kept eating not paying attention after he went off criticizing his brothers.   
“Hey, pay attention when I’m talki’ to ya, dunce! Or do those ears of yours not work?!” he snapped.   
“I really don’t care much about your sibling complaints.” I replied honestly.   
“Anyways, I’m sure the others have already scurried off to class and left me to look after ya on my own, the punks.” He said disgruntled.   
“Well, I am YOUR responsibility. Not theirs.” I said matter of factly.   
“Dammit. They’re all rotten, every last one of ‘em. This all comes back to Lucifer! Getting stuck having to look after a human, ending up in a pact, everything bad is his fault! The way Levi’s haircut is so lame, and Satan’s horns are so stupid-looking, and Lucifer’s feet are so putrid, all of it is Lucifer’s fault!... Not that I’ve actually smelled his feet, but still!”  
I chuckled and rubbed his head, “You are so cute when you complain.”  
He blushed, “Don’t treat me like a child!” he snapped.   
“Anyways, I have been wondering, what’s at the top of the stairs?” I asked.   
“HEY, I TOLD you to LISTEN to me when I’m TALKIN’ to you! I was tryin’ to tell you about Lucifer’s fe- wait, what stairs? Are you talkin’ about the stairs that lead up to the attic? Oh man, there you go again, stickin’ your nose where it doesn’t belong…” He said.   
I leaned back on my chair and huffed. “Please tell me?” I asked as sweetly as I could.   
“Now listen, do you know the secret to getting people to tell you stuff? Go ahead, tell me.” He asked sternly.   
“Proper manners?” I asked sweetly, knowing he meant money, because greed.   
“Sure, I guess that’s important too. And actually, if ya know that, you oughta show me more respect!” I rolled my eyes, “Now listen, manner are important, sure, But there’s something even MORE important, isn’t there?”  
“You are going to say money, aren’t you?” I said a little annoyed.   
“Exactly, you get it, I’m talking about money! Sweet, sweet money! That’s what the world revolved around… money, money and more money!” I rolled my eyes and chugged my coffee. He might not be helpful unless I used the pact and I didn’t want to do that. “Wait a second… Uh-oh, I know what this is about!”   
I eyed him shocked, “Do you now?”  
“You tried to climb those stairs, but Lucifer stopped you right? That’s totally it, isn’t it?” He said proud of how smart he was.   
“Wow, you are smarter than I thought, Mammon.” I mused.   
“Well, then there’s something you really need to get straight now. If you think you can just offer Mammon here a little but of money and he’ll spill the beans, you’re dead wrong. I mean, pretend I told you somethin’ I shouldn’t. Lucifer would beat me half to death. Actually, I’d be lucky if that’s all he did. If I WEREN’T lucky, he’d have me eliminated. It’d take a good two hundred million years to recover from that.”  
I looked at him with concern, “Is Lucifer really that abusive with you?”  
He ignored that, “Still, if you’re bound and determined to buy this information off me… Then you’’’ have to offer me, let’s see… How about the monetary equivalent of the world’s total oil production? Two hundred million years worth. That might work.”  
I sighed, “Mammon, no one has that kind of money.”  
“In other words, I ain’t gonna tell ya. Is that clear enough for ya, blockhead?” he replied triumphally.  
Then a thought occurred to me, “Huh. You are that afraid of Lucifer, are you?”  
“WHAT?! Whoa, what’d you just say? You think I’M actually afraid of Lucifer?! Me, the Avatar of Greed? You’ve gotta be kidding! I’m not the least bit afraid of him, got it? Not even a little!” Mammon was now defensive.   
“I mean, ya’ know, I get it. You are scared of him. It’s fine to be honest about it.” I mused.   
“I told you, I’m not! I mean, that’s crazy! Listen now, most of the time, I don’t let people see the full extent of my power! What I’m sayin’ is that even if I did face off against someone like Lucifer, I wouldn’t even have to use all of my strength to win! Understand?!” Mammon put on a though act.   
“Then tell me what’s up those stairs.” I said sternly.   
I had won and he was going to help, “All right, fine! I will! You can’t get up the stairs because Lucifer’s blocking the way, right?! You need to do somethin’ to get rid of him, right?! Well, guess what? Distracting Lucifer is easy as pie! Listen up, ‘cause I’m only gonna say this once, so, clean the wax outta your ears for a change and pay attention!” I nodded furiously. “You know that series Levi likes? What was it called… um, The Tale of the Seven… Seven… Seven Ways to Get Rich Quick… wait, no. That’s the book I was readin’ the other day.”   
“The Tale of the Seven Lords” I offered.   
He nodded, “Right, yeah. That’s the one. Anyway, you need to get your hands on vinyl edition copy of the soundtrack for that Tale of the Seven whatsawhosit. If you have that, you can use it to distract Lucifer no problem!” he beamed.   
I was confused, “Wh-“  
Mammon already knew what I would ask, “Don’t ask why, ‘cause I’ve got no idea why Lucifer’s interested in somethin’ like that either. But if you wanna climb those stairs, you’re gonna have to start by gettin’ your hands on that soundtrack.”   
“Mammon, would you please help me do it?” I asked.   
“Wha? I don’t understand. Why should I help you? If ya want that soundtrack, then go find Levi and work it out with him yourself, dummy.”   
I pouted. “But you are my friend.”  
“Welp, time for me to go. As much as I hate goin’ to class, I don’t have much of a-“  
I cut him off, “Mammon, come with me.” I said as I stood.   
“HEY! Wh-What’s goin’ on?! Dammit, my body… it’s movin’ on its own!” I began to walk away and looked at him struggling and I guess I sort of willed him to follow me. “Grrr…! F-Fine, all right! I’ll go with you, okay?!”I smiled triumphally and continued to will him to move along with me. “It feels like you’ve got some kinda invisible cord tied around my neck… Aaah, stop pullin’ on it!.... I said stoooooop!”  
I stopped and he walked up to me, I kissed his cheek. “Thank you Mammon.” I grabbed his arm and pulled him along as I continued walking to Levi’s room.   
“D’AAAH! Quit pullin’ on me! Gr… dammit, lemme go! Let… me… go… this… instaAAAH…!” He struggled all the way. The I stopped and let go of our pact in a single movement. He stumbled he hit the wall. “Ow…! Hey, what the hell?! Ya coulda at least given me a little warning before lettin’ go! I hit my head just now, ya know?!”  
I knew I was being too rough and demanding. “Sorry Mammon, I am just going to ask him and we can go to class.”  
He put his hands on his hips, “I can’t believe you decided to go straight to Levi and ask him for the soundtrack… You really don’t have any patience, do ya?!” First of all, there’s no way Levi’s just gonna agree to lend you his Tale of whatever-it-was vinyl soundtrack. Actually, he ain’t even gonna let you inside his room. I’m sure of it!” I furrowed my eyebrows at him, “Don’t go thinkin’ that everything’s gonna go your way ‘cause ya want it to! You know what your problem is? I’ll tell you-“  
Then he was cut off by Levi’s voice from hims room, “Mammon, you jackass…”  
Then there it was, that familiar pang on my chest.  
“What…? Who said that?! I’m not a jackass, or an idiot or a scumbag or a money-obsessed moron!... Which you didn’t actually call me, but still!” His issues were showing. “ hold on, I recognize that voice. So where ARE you anyway?”  
“You’re making too way too much noise, Mammon. Would you do me a favor, and NOT stand outside my door being loud? I’m in the middle of watching the best scene of The Magical Ruri Hana: Demon Girl.” Leviathan continued.   
“Levi, we need to talk to you. Get off your ass and come to the door.!” Mammon said.   
“No.” Leviathan replied.   
“See? See? What’d I tell ya? Ge won’t even open the damn door for us. Don’t just stand there, Valentina. Try sayin’ somethin’ to him.” Mammon told me. He was right this was my endeavor.   
I thought of the best way to a weeb’s heart “Leeeviii Sempai! I would love to watch The Magical Ruri Hana Demon Girl too!!! And in the meantime, borrow your TSL soundtrack!”  
“No.” Leviathan replied.   
Mammon looked disappointed, “Ugh, come on… That was awful. You’re not supposed to tell him why we’re here. He’s not the kind of guy who does favors if you ask him.”  
Solomon walked up to us, “Hey, I was wondering who that was out here in the hall. So, it’s the pair everyone is talking about.”  
“Good morning Solomon, how are you doing on this fine day in hell?” I asked.   
Solomon chuckled, “Very well, Valentina. Thanks for asking.”  
“Wha? Oh, Solomon, it’s you. What do ya mean by that?” Mammon asked.   
Solomon looked very serious “I’m referring to the rumor regarding a certain human by the name of Valentina” I curtsied at my name. “A human who looks very ordinary at first glance but has already managed to make a pact with a demon, despite having only gotten here.” Then he smiled, “Apparently this demon must be a real idiot, because he let a human discover and exploit his greatest weakness and was then tricked into forging a pact.”   
Mammon laughed, “What demon is that? He must be a total numbskull! Ha, what an idiot!” I stared at him completely baffled yet amused, “…Wait, you’re talkin’ about ME!”   
I wrapped my arm around Mammon’s “Yes that’s right, this idiot is mine now. So, don’t go around talking shit about him or we are going to have issues.”   
Mammon glared and shoved me off, Solomon seemed amused by the exchange.   
“Anyway, what’re you even doin’ here, Solomon?” Mammon asked.   
“I’m here because Levi invited me.” Solomon replied.   
“Wha? Levi invited YOU? To his room? No way, I don’t buy it.” Mammon replied.   
“I’m afraid it’s the truth.” Solomon replied smugly.   
“Damn, Solomon gets around! Nice.” I said suggestively.   
Solomon gave me a look which I was not sure if it was confusion, disgust or both. Then he knocked on the door, “Levi? It’s me.”  
“What’s the secret phrase?” Leviathan asked from his room.  
“The second lord.” Solomon began.   
Levi continued. “…attempted to steal the Lord of Corruption’s platypus which could ley golden eggs…”  
Then Solomon continued, “…having incurred the wrath of the Lord of Corruption for this misdeed…”  
“… it was ordered that the second lord would be forever dubbed The Lord of Fools.’ Secret phrase authenticated. You may enter.” Levi finished  
I was there awe struck, “This is the weirdest mating ritual I have EVER seen, and I have seen a lot of documentaries.”  
Both men looked at me like I was insane.   
“Well, guess I’ll see you two later. Bye.” Solomon then disappeared trough the door.   
“What were they even talking about just now…? Wait a minute… That was the secret phrase! They gave it away, didn’t they?!” Mammon exclaimed, “Excellent. All right, try saying what Solomon did.”  
I knocked, “Leviathan for the love of all anime let me in.”  
“What is the secret phrase?” Levi asked.   
“The second lord…” I began.   
Leviathan made a buzzing sound, “Secret phrase authentication failure. Access denied.”  
Mammon was just as confused as I was, “Wha? Wait, that was totally right! It’s exactly what Solomon said!”  
“The Secret phrase is periodically reset.” Leviathan replied.   
“You’re saying it’s a one-time password? Seriously?!” Mammon exclaimed.   
“Fuck you Leviathan, I seriously want to watch anime I am bored out of my fucking mind!” I snapped.   
“Maybe you should come back after you’ve at least watches TSL on DVD.” Leviathan replied.   
“Ugh, Come on! What the hell, Levi?!” Mammon replied frustrated.   
“Bite me Leviathan!” I screamed. Then I huffed and turned to Mammon, dragging him to leave as we did have class.   
“… I don’t understand exactly what’s goin’ on here, but from what I can gather… basically, Solomon just proved to Levi that he’s a total TSL nerd too, so now they’re buddies. Which means that if you wanna borrow that soundtrack from Levi…then you’re gonna have to do what Solomon did, and become a TSL nerd yourself. It’s that or nothing!” Mammon exclaimed  
I sighed, “Right! That is brilliant! Omg you can be so smart some times Mammon. And it gives me something else to do than sulk in my room!”  
I hugged him, because where I come from hugs are normal and I’m a hugger.   
He pushed me away, He grunted, “Oi, ya’ can’t just do that out of nowhere!”  
“Mammon, you are going to have to get used to me appreciating ya’” I replied.   
Then I pulled out my D.D.D. and texted Levi, because I just had too, ‘Thanks Levi. I appreciate your suggestion.’ He replied but I ignored it.


	4. Learning his Language

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this edition, Valentina has to channel her inner dork to prepare for he challange.

Chapter 4: Learning his Language  
We managed to get to class on time. After school we went to Akuzon and I purchased the DVDS, a DVD player and a small TV. The I bought some snacks. I pretty much spent all I had made, but it gave me something to do. Mammon was not thrilled about me dragging him around all day.   
Then Mammon, Beel and I, gathered in my room to watch the DVDs.  
“So, explain somethin’ to me. Why do I gotta join you for this TSL Full Series DVD Marathon Night you’re doin’?! and you say it’s 12 hours total?! What’s up with that?! We’ll be up all damn night!” Mammon exclaimed.   
“Yeah, and it’s almost midterms. You must have a lot of free time, Mammon.” Beel said.   
“No, I DON’T!... Anyway, you’re one to talk! What about you, Beel?! You’re here too!” Mammon snapped.   
Beel smiled, “A movie marathon means there’s going to be popcorn.” Seeing the big guy smile was kind of cute…  
“You’re tellin’ me you’re just here for the food, beggin’ the human for treats like some kind of dog?!” Mammon replied.   
I gasped, “No, Mammon, don’t talk to your little brother like that. He is not a dog, at least he willingly want to spend time with me and we don’t even have a pact, what’s up with that Mammon?! Anyways, I promise to help cram for midterms. We will all do excellent on them.”   
“All I know is that once we start watching, I get to start eating. So, hurry up!” Beelzebub said sternly.   
I turned to Beel, “Oh no, Corazon, where I come from, we eat the popcorn before the movie even starts. Go ahead, grab one of the bags.”I had bought quite a few bags, knowing the scent of popcorn would attract Beelzebub.   
“Ugh, this is so stupid that it’s… it’s unreal. Why am I stuck watching this too…?” Mammon continued to complain  
I finished setting up the TV and DVD. I sat next in between them on my bed as I clicked for volume and the menu. “Because, you are curious, and you wanna be my friend too. So, submit already.” I said as I leaned against him.   
We watched and by the second disk, Mammon was crying and commenting about the series. He was more invested and involved than I was. Beel just told him to keep watching to know what happened. By volume 5 he was sobbing snot and all. Which Beel also commented on.   
The next day, without any sleep as we headed for class, Mammon quizzed me and I answered correctly.   
“You may seem like an airhead, but I’ve gotta admit, you did pretty well.” He said with a smile. “I’d say you should be able to convince Levi that ya know your stuff at this point.”  
I smiled back, “Thank you Mammon. I really appreciate all your help, really. Sorry for being a pain.” I kissed his cheek and he blushed.   
Before he could even say anything we were interrupted by Levi, “Hey, human.”  
“Ah, well, speak of the devil.” Mammon said.   
“Well, good morning Leviathan. This human has a name just like everyone else in this household.” I said smiling brightly at him. I was in a good mood.   
“I heard what you’re up to, human. Seems that you’re trying to suck up to me so I’ll like you.” Leviathan said, he didn’t seem happy.   
“Whaddya mean? Who told you that?” Mammon asked.   
“It’s no use playing dumb. I heard it from Lucifer.” He replied.   
“Huh? I thought it was because of that text I sent you… wait… how does Lucifer even know?!” I said.   
Mammon echoed me, “Lucifer? How the hell does he end up hearing every single thing that gets said around here?”  
“That’s not important.” Said Levi sternly. “You know. I’ve heard it said that the time a fool spends thinking is WASTED time. I think that applies here. You’re lucky to have so much time on your hands that you can sit around thinking up schemes like this. There’s so much anime I need to watch, so many figurines and trading cards I need to organize, so many games I need to play just sitting piled up.”  
“Well, if you weren’t so stubborn, you could have some assistance.” I replied.   
“As much as I wish I could watch a marathon of every TSL DVD, I don’t have the time… So, why do YOU get to have so much free time? It’s so not fair. “  
“Ah! I was waiting for him to say that. Levi’s signature line. ‘It’s so not fair;” Mammon said.   
“Shut up, Mammon, You’re an Idiot.” Levi said, he was clearly upset  
“You know, Levi, you need to start showin’ your older brother some more respect!” Mammon said sternly.   
I looked from Mammon to Levi, “You do fucking realize I legit have nothing to do. I have NOTHING here, but clothes I bought and now a TV, a DVD player and TSL DVD. That is how I have fucking time. Regardless, aren’t you glad someone around here is actually trying to relate to your shuttin ass?”  
“I don’t know what it is you’re plotting, but I’m not about to get all buddy-buddy with some human normie. Understand? I’m not like Mammon. Get that trough your head.” Leviathan told me sternly.  
That triggered something in me.   
“Hey! It’s not like I’m buddy-buddy with this human either! My body obeys the orders on its own, whether I like it or not. Like when I’m told ‘stay’ or ‘go home’ and stuff,. It’s not my fault” Mammon snapped.   
I frowned, “That hurts Mammon. And you Levi. You get off your high horse. You are the idiot here, you can’t just insult your older brother and behave like a child and a brat. Just because I am trying to be nice to you, doesn’t give you the right to insult your brother!” I snapped. I was unreasonably upset that he would insult Mammon.   
Mammon stared at me surprised, I guess he was not used to someone taking his side.   
“Don’t go getting any ideas in your head, human.” Levi said and I was just glaring at him.  
I was not going to back down, specially not after he insulted Mammon, which I was upset over without reason, “if you think you are so hot, then lets compete, to see who is the bigger TSL fan.”  
Leviathan was taken aback, “What? Where did that come from?” then he looked amused, “Do you seriously think you could beat me in a competition involving TSL” he laughed, “That’s hilarious! Lololol As if I’d actually accept a challenge like that. I mean I already know what the outcome would be.”  
That just fueled my determination, “Are you afraid this normie human could kick your ass?”  
“Excuse me? Did you process anything I just said? Where are you getting this idea that I might actually lose to you?” Leviathan was incredulous.   
Mammon was looking in back in forth between me and Leviathan as if a bomb was about to go off.   
“So, you are afraid of this human dominating you?” I replied.   
“Excuse me? EXCUSE ME?! Are you processing ANYTHING I’m saying here?!” Leviathan couldn’t believe I was challenging him.   
“Damn, Leviathan I didn’t know you were such a coward.” Then I leaned close to him so that I was inches from him, “Gallina.” I whispered.   
“Hey! Watch what you say, human!” Leviathan snapped.   
“Some otaku you are~” I continued.   
“I can’t argue with you there.” Mammon said.   
“”Levi is an-“ I began with my next taunt, but he interrupted.   
“Fine. If that’s what you want, I’ll do it. I accept your challenge. We’ll compete to see which one of us loves TSL more, you or me. “ Leviathan cave in.  
“If I win, you make a pact with me, If I lose you can eat me, have my soul, whatever suits you.” I challenged.  
“Just one thing, though. If you lose, you might never make it back to the human world alive.” Leviathan said sternly.   
I smirked, “Oh Levi, who said I have plans of returning or even surviving the year for that matter? I know where I stand Leviathan.”  
“But you still want to do this, right? Okay.” Leviathan replied with a smirk and he walked away.   
“Now ya’ done it!” Mammon exclaimed.   
“He insulted you, it pissed me off. I was not letting him walk away with that and I am certainly not letting him win. I have to figure out something he doesn’t know.” I replied.   
“They’re always calling me stuff like idiot and scum.” Mammon shrugged.  
“That was before you had a pact with me. I give a damn, Mammon, now accept this friendship and suck it up. I might stay quiet if you deserve it, but that was uncalled for. Leviathan had no right nor reason. You paid him back, gave him the Serafina figure. He has no right treating you like that.” I felt the anger tickling in the back of my mind.   
We made out way to RAD and went our separate ways.   
I saw Satan on the stairs. “Hello there, Valentina.” Next to him stood Beelzebub/  
“Well Hello there, Satan.” I said politely.   
“I heard about what’s happening. It seems you and Levi are going to have a little competition.” He replied with a smile.   
“How the fuck does everyone know every single thing I do?!!” I exclaimed.   
“… Are you hoping to find out what’s in the attic room? Is that it?” Beelzebub asked.   
I looked at him incredulously. “Do I have any privacy? Do you guys watch me shower too?”Beelzebub stared at me, expecting an answer. “Yes. I am.”  
“Huh. You don’t say… I’ll let you in on a nice piece of information. Levi is the demon of envy. If you can work him into a jealous frenzy, he’ll lose control of himself. Then he’ll be guaranteed to slip up somehow, giving you an opening you can exploit.” Beel replied with a smile. Then he turned very serious, “Just one thing, though. I Levi does lose control of himself your life will also be in danger.”  
“Ooh, the adrenaline of near-death experiences. The promise of the Devildom. I look forward to it.” I said enthusiastically, “Anyways, I don’t understand why you are being nice to me but thank you.”   
“If you want to thank me, give me food.” Beel replied.   
I opened my bag and gave pulled a bar of something I had bought for the movie night, but I hid it away because I wanted to try it. I gave it to Beel and he smiled.   
“You can buy me a megaton-size bowl of pasta with mixed entrails.. And I’d like that topped with sliced anaconda, fried tarantula , and Nile crocodile brains.” Beel beamed.   
I smiled, “I promise I will buy you food once I dealt with this.”   
“I’ll give you a piece of advice too.” Satan said sternly.   
“What are YOU scheming?” I asked.   
He ignored me, “The DVD version of TSL is up to season 7 right now. That’s the most recent release. Meanwhile, the original book version is up to volume 8 at this point.” Then he smiled, “Volume 9 of the book isn’t out yet. But if you want to know what’s going to happen in it, you should ask Simeon.”  
“Why would Simeon know something like that?” I asked completely confused.  
“Don’t ask me…. Ask him.” Satan replied.   
“Okay.. so why are you just offering up free advice like that?” I questioned  
“No reason. Don’t read too much into it” he replied. I looked at him questioningly. “It just happens that it’s in my best interest for you to beat Levi.”   
“and?” I questioned.   
He laughed, “I enjoy making things difficult for Lucifer, that’s all.” Satan seemed pleased with himself.  
I nodded, “Seems legit, that is something I can get behind of. Thank you for the advice.”  
Satan looked shocked, “I’m surprised you’re so willing to take my word for it on this, You aren’t concerned I might be lying to you?”  
I shook my head, “I am not worried about you Satan, Of all the demons, I doubt you have reason to lie to me, specially if it’s for the good of annoying Lucifer, I am sure that benefits most of us. I will be able to tell once I talk to Simeon. I don’t think angels are keen on lying. So, again, thank you. I hope I can make it up to you as well and maybe borrow some of those books.”  
Satan looked impressed.   
With that I walked away. Later in the day I had a class with Mammon and I told him what happened.   
“So, let me get this straight…You’re tellin’ me that Beel and Satan both gave you hints for how to defeat Levi.” I nodded, “Ya don’t dau… How VERY interesting…” Mammon looked pleased with himself. “Well, ya know why they did that though, right? It’s all because I’m lookin’ after ya. You’ve got Mammon to thank for this/ Okay, here’s the deal. Those two are givin’ you special treatment because they know that I’m the one in charge of you. They want me to be pleaed with them, ya see. So, whaddya think about that? NOW you get it, doncha! It’s clear how important I am, and how much my younger brothers respect me!”  
I rolled my eyes, “I guess that they had their reasons, but regardless. Thank you Mammon.”  
“Wh…hey! Come on, it feels weird when you agree with me like that. I mean, doncha think you should’ve taken that opportunity to put me down or somethin’?”  
I chuckled, “No, Mammon, I do not have the urge to put you down all the time. There’s no reason for you to put you down right now. Just don’t piss me off and I will not be putting you down.”  
“Eh, whatever… Just let this be a learnin’ experience. From now on, you oughta respect me like they do!” he continued.   
“I do respect you, Mammon.” I replied.   
Mammon got serious then. “Ugh, forget it. Let’s just get down to business.”   
“To defeat the Huns?” I said with a smile.   
“What? No… You and me need to figure out what our strategy’s gonna be with this Levi thing. First off, what Beel told you is right. If you make Levi jealous, he’s bound to lose his cool. Though there’s no guarantee he won’t kill ya if that happen. But that’s just how it’s gotta be. There’s no way you’ll beat Levi in a competition over who’s the biggest TSL nerd. Not id you fight fair. You’d best face up to the fact that this is gonna involve a little risk” Mammon continued.   
“I understand and I am willing to do whatever it takes.” I replied.   
Mammon nodded, “So, we’vegotta figure out how you’re gonna manage to make him jealous. He may be called the Avatar of Envy, but it’s hard to make him give in to it. Instead of gettin’ super jealous of you, he’ll get all negative about his own situation. He’ll start talkin’ about how it’s “not fair” and you’re “Lucky” and stuff. You’re not gonna be able to get him to lose his cool just by doing a little bragging. No, you’re gonna have to do somethin’ to make him REAL jealous. So jealous that he nearly pops a blood vessel. Hmmmm…. Maybe we oughta ask someone for advice.”  
“So, let’s ask an angel?” I said.


	5. How not to die to a Fanboy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this edition, Valentia uses her skills for the very unbalanced quiz.

Chapter 5: How not to die to a Fanboy  
Two days later after school. I had read all the TSL books and spoken with Simeon. We headed to the student council room. These extra idiots have organized this to be like a real trivia. Diavolo and Lucifer sat in their respective chairs.   
Asmodeus was with a microphone being an extra host. “All right, everyone! Finally, that wait is over! It’s time for Devil’s Trivia Showdown, the quiz show that pits demon against human! Today our competitors will be testing their knowledge regarding a super-famous, super-popular fantasy series. One that’s known by young and old alike… The take of the seven lords! Now it’s time to introduce our two competitors. First, he’s a demon who freely admits to being a giant TSL nerd! Meet Leviathan!”  
“I am the G.O.A.T. None can oppose me!” Leviathan beamed.   
I laughed out loud.   
“And his challenger claims to have been introduced to TSL only very recently after binge watching the DVDs! Say hello to Valentina!”  
“I am going to decimate you, weeb trash!” I said.   
“You binge-watched the DVDs ONCE. That’s it! The fact that you would dare challenge me is an insult to TSL itself. It’s a sacrilege!” Leviathan started glowing, “It’s so infuriating that I can’t even feel anger. I can only laugh AHAHAHA”   
“Serving as judge for today’s competition is our very own Demon Lord himself, Diavolo!” Asmo beamed like a talk show host.   
“Hello there, everyone. Good to see you” Diavolo beamed.   
“Color commentary will be provided by Satan, Avatar of Wrath. But good commentator needs to keep a cool head. I wonder, is he really up to the task.” Asmodeus frowned concerned.   
“I don’t think that’s going to be a problem. SO, I’m doing the commentary? That’s a lot of responsibility.” Satan beamed.   
Asmo seemed to sigh, “No say hello to our guest demon, the always-famished Beelzebub! For his appearance fee, he requested to be compensated in cheeseburgers. How very Beel of him…”  
Beelzebub was eating, “Nothing beats one of Hell’s Kitchen’s special Cheeseburgers They age the cheese 40000 years for maximum flavor.”  
Then Asmo smiled brightly, it was his turn, “And your host for the day is none other than yours truly, Asmodeus. The demon who can make you swoon by simply whispering into your ear. You all know me, you all love me.”  
I felt my eyes my eyes dislodged themselves from my eye sockets as I rolled my eyes. “This is unnecessary. Can we like, get to doing this?”  
“I Agree, that’s enough. This is getting’ ridiculous. Let’s get this show on the road!” Mammon exclaimed.   
“I thought you hated wasting your time at events like this, Mammon. Yet here you are. Truly, wonders never cease.” Lucifer commented.   
Mammon blushed, “I’ve got some free time, that’s all.”  
Then finally we got to the questions and I answered it correctly.   
“Mm, my cheeseburger came with onion rings, the kind of all side items, Yum.” Said Beelzebub.   
I laughed out loud. It was cute and it had NOTHING to do with this. “I still owe you dinner, so don’t get too full. Beel.”  
Then Asmodeus continued with the next question which Leviathan answered. This question was more complicated than mine.   
Satan noticed too, “Is it just me, or was that question a little too specific? Only a mega nerd would know that.”  
Diavolo was amused, “This is shaping up to be quite entertaining, isn’t it Lucifer?”  
“I’m glad you find it to your liking, Diavolo.” Lucifer replied with a smile I was sure meant he thought everyone else in the room was an idiot.   
Then Asmodeus asked me a very simple question which I answered correctly, then he asked Leviathan a specific question of a specific page of one of the TSL books. Of course, Levi quoted the page word for word. Then Satan commented bout how Lord of Fools was a scumbag.  
“why does it feel like you’re insulting ME right now?” Mammon asked.   
I had noticed the similarities too, I figured the author was heavily inspired in these bunch of idiots.   
Asmo asked me a question about the fifth lord who was self-absorbed and Asmo made a comment about that being his type of guy. Of course, he was. Then he asked Leviathan another ridiculously specific scene in one of the DVDS, down to the exact second the scene, asking what was displayed. Leviathan answered the question perfectly.   
Of course the resident Otaku noticed the difficulty in his questions. “Hey, is it just me, or have all my questions been way harder than Valentina’s? Like, suspiciously harder. Though they’re still so easy for me that I’m ready to fall asleep here. “  
I nodded, “Yeah, who the fuck wrote these questions, anyway?”   
“Anyway… how long are we going to keep this charade up? This is getting boring.” Leviathan said.   
“Agreed, it is.” I said.   
“Yep. I’d say it has. All right, Valentina, it’s time to pull out the big guns! Let’s see how Levi here likes your trump card! Levi, you’re way too full of yourself. Which is why we’re about to reach inside ya, yank out that pride , and crush it like a bug!” Mammon said loudly. I grimaced at the last part, since one of the boys animal was a bug, I mean, not scientifically speaking. However, I enjoyed that Mammon talked about us as a team.  
“What..?” Leviathan asked incredulously.   
“Well, well, interesting…” Diavolo commented.   
Asmo overdramatically threw his arms up, “Wow! It sounds to me like the gauntlet has been thrown down! It would seem Valentina has some sort of trump card to use against Leviathan!” Then he went back to his host charisma, “Perhaps now would be a good time to check in with our color commentator. Satan, what do you think this could be about?”  
Satan smiled mischievously and knowingly, “Well, it’s not surprising that Valentina would come into this with a secret weapon. It seems that the advice I gave is about to pay some dividends. Excellent.”  
Asmodeus then continued to put on a show, trying to sound somewhat shocked and slightly upset. The perfect mix as if we were on television, “Just a minute… Satan, are you telling us that you provided aid to Valentina? How very wicked of you!” Then Asmo got serious, “I supposed this would be a good time to get your take on this as well, Beel”  
Beel smiled, “If you want to hear what I have to say, it’s going to cost you. Let’s say one extra-large bowl of katsudon and some miso soup to go along with that.”  
I laughed out loud.   
“OK, whose isea was it to invite Beel to this, huh? He’s done nothing but eat this entire time!” Asmo said upset.   
I laughed again. These bunch of idiots were sitcom.   
Asmodeus then became the perfect host again, “In any event, if Valentina doe chance a secret weapon, it could mean something that will make winning against Leviathan possible! Perhaps we should hear what Valentina’s opponent thinks about this. Tell me Levi, what’s running through your head right now?!”  
“ROFLMAO! Loooooooooooooooool!” was Levi’s reply.   
“Right… I have absolutely no idea what you’re saying! But clearly you don’t see this as a threat… Got it!” Asmodeus beamed.   
I laughed again, “You guys are entertainment for days. I love it.”  
Asmo then looked intrigued, “So what could this trum card of Valentina be?! Let’s find out!!”  
I had to be extra, because I couldn’t let the demons one up me. I got in the table podium thing between me and Leviathan. “Okay, Major spoilers incoming, Ya’ better cover your ears, Leviathan, you are NOT going to like this.” I started pacing on the table making sure my heels clicked loudly. moving my arms as I was dramatic myself, and using my hands to exaggerated things with my arms and my skirt almost graced Levi’s face when I walked close to him; as I explained the plot of the yet unreleased TSL Volume 9. Leviathan was staring at my incredulously the entire time, Asmodeus was eying me up and down and Satan looked impressed. When I finished I sat down right in front of Leviathan, putting one leg over the other, making Leviathan take a step back. I glanced at Lucifer, he rolled his eyes at my actions, Satan was displaying a face I could only describe as ‘not bad’. Beel…. Just ate.   
Leviathan couldn’t believe what he heard, “Wh…what…?...NO! That’s insane… the Lord of Mask wouldn’t do that to the Lord of Shadow. Lies, all of it! Pure hogwash! Don’t think you can fool me by making up stuff like that!”  
“Hmm. Actually, Valentina doesn’t appear to be lying as far as I can see.” Diavolo said sternly.   
I got off from the table.   
“Levi, you know as well as I do that Lord Diavolo has the ability to discern whether someone is telling the truth.” Satan explained.   
I leaned closely to Leviathan and whispered softly, “I win.” Then smirked and walked away back to my side as he ranted about what was said online.   
“What you said CAN’T happen! It…. Just CAN’T!” Leviathan snapped.   
“Huh, so all that stuff Simeon told you was true then? How about that. Still though, how is that he knows all that?” Mammon commented.   
Asmo called back the attention to himself, I had taken the spotlight from him long enough. “All right, um… Okay, I suppose that settles who the true TSL nerd is…”  
“I won’t stand for this. All you did was stay up one-night marathoning the DVD’s” Levi began.   
“And I read the books!” I added, because books mattered.   
He ignored me, “The idea that someone like YOU could actually be a bigger TSL fan than me, it’s…”  
I knew I was awful, and I would regret it, but I had to poke him further, “Submit to me, Leviathan.” I said in the sexiest voice I could muster.   
Then Leviathan really got angry.   
“Wh-Whoa, calm down there, Levi…!” Mammon said.   
“No…. no, I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIIIIS!” Levi snapped and then he was glowing and in his demon form.   
“Uh-oh… Valentina, run! Get out of here!” Mammon shouted.   
I wasn’t going to leave. I stood my grown and stared defiantly at Leviathan, “I am not afraid of you Leviathan. Now you have some balls and accept the outcome.”  
“Valentina… Dammit, I’m not gonna make it in time…!” Mammon said as Leviathan launched at me.   
Then Lucifer was in front of me in all his glory, his demon form. The quickness of the action made me stumble and I fall. “Carajo.” I cursed in Spanish.   
“That’s enough. I believe you were going to settle this via QUIZ, weren’t you? Not trough violence. You’re out of control, Levi” Lucifer snapped in disappointment and anger.   
“L… Lucifer…” Leviathan said, clearly scared of the eldest brother.   
“Wh…?!” Mammon exclaimed  
Asmodeus was not going to deviate from his role, “Unbelievable! Just as Leviathan was about to strike who should step in and stop him but the one and only Lucifer himself! Simply, incredible”  
“I haven’t seen you leap to someone’s rescue like that in quite some time, Lucifer.” Satan commented.   
Then Beelzebub gagged, “Ack… food… caught in my throat…”   
I would have chuckled if my hand didn’t hurt. Of course my dumb as put all her wight on my hand as I fell.   
Lucifer looked like a disappointed parent, “Levi, go back to your room and cool off.”  
Leviathan didn’t move.   
Then Lord Diavolo walked over and I had never seen this charismatic ruler look so dangerous, “Levi? You heard what he said, right?”  
“… Yeah.” Leviathan mumbled as he left, still in his demon form.   
Lord Diavolo and Lucifer both looked like disappointed parents.   
Mammon was making a face I couldn’t read.   
“What is it, Mammon? You look like you want to say something.” Lucifer asked.   
Mammon shrugged, “No. I don’t wanna say nothin’”  
“So, what’re we going to do now? How are we supposed to have our competition without Levi?” Asmo said disappointed.   
Lord Diavolo walked over to me, “I guess this means the competition ends in a draw. Neither one of them won.” He said as he helped me up.   
I pouted, “But Lord Diavolo, don’t I even get extra points for knowing the future TSL Events? For looking awesome and Extra?”  
Diavolo just looked at me amused, “I have determined this will be a draw.”  
I pouted, “Extra points for injuries?” I said showing my swollen throbbing hand.   
“I’ve got an idea. You should give your guest free cafeteria meal tickets as a parting fit, Fifty years’ worth ought to do the trick.” Beel commented.  
“Still, I have to say I find it surprising that you would go out of your way just to rescue a mere human, Lucifer. Very surprising…” Satan said with emphasis on the last two words. “Don’t you agree, Mammon?”  
“Huh? Why’re ya askin’ me?” Mammon asked.   
“As the oldest, it is naturally my duty to clean up my younger sibling’ messes.” Lucifer said.   
Lucifer turned to me and grabbed my hand, “Puñeta.” I said, cursing again in Spanish. I had tears stinging my eyes from the pain of the action.   
“It seems you sprained your wrist.” He said nonchalant then looked over at Mammon, “Mammon, deal with this.”   
Mammon walked over to me, unsarcastically quiet, without complains, “Let go, ya dumb human.” He said as he grabbed my arm and dragged me away.   
We called for a Pizza delivery to the House of Lamentation. I ordered some spicy rainbow pizza and left that box at Levi’s door, I knocked, then I sent him a text letting him know I did ‘Left you Spicy Rainbow Pizza. Grab it before Beel does.’  
After showering and getting in something comfortable I sat on my bed with Mammon as he bandaged my wrist.   
“So, ya made it out of that without being attacked, only to end up fallin’on your butt and sprainin’ your wrist. Seriously, could you be any more of a klutz?”  
“You humans really are way less physically capable than us demons.” Beel commented.   
“No, shit Beelzebub!” I said and then Mammon moved my hand, “ouch!”  
“That’s because they don’t eat enough. And unlike us, they don’t eat the right things.” Beel continued.   
“Stop tying everything back to food, Beel!” Mammon snapped. “Seems to me that you’ve been spendin’ an awful lot of time here ever since the night of the DVD marathon.”  
Beel frowned, “Well, so have you.” He countered. “I mean, you’ve even left an D.D.D. charger here. And a toothbrush too. That’s how much you’re over here.” He smiled.   
“W…well that’s because, uh… you know… I’ve gotta look after this human, don’t I? It’s my job…”Mammon said in the most tsundere matter.   
I smiled, “Well, I don’t mind the company. I have never had anyone to hang out with me before. So, whatever the reasons for you both being here, I’m grateful. ouch”  
Beel looked concerned, “Mammon, you’re doing a terrible job with those bandages.”  
“Hey, shut up! I’ve never had to wrap someone’s wrist before, okay? I don’t know how it works! If you think I’m doing such a bad job, then why don’t YOU do it, Beel!” Mammon exclaimed.   
Beelzebub ignored him and he munched on the pizza, “mmm nothing beats pizza for a midnight snack.”  
“Dammit Beel, listen to me when I’m talking to you! Wait a minute… Isn’t that MY slice you’ve got there in your other hand?!” Mammon snapped.   
“You know, I could really go for a soda right now. I’m going to run to the kitchen.” Beel said ignoring Mammon.   
“Ooh, can you bring me something too Beel?” I asked.   
Beel smiled at me and walked off with both slices of pizza in his hands.   
“Hey, Beel You put down once of those slices you’re holdin’ right now! HEY! Of all the… Seriusly, does that guy ever stop eatin’?! You’d better keep a close eye on your pizza, or he’ll steal yours away next.” Mammon said.   
“I will!” I said as I tried to keep my complaining to a minimum.   
“Ah… um, by the way… There’s somethin’ I want you to know.” Mammon began. I looked at him questioningly. “Listen. The next time your life’s in danger. I’m gonna be the one to save you, all right? Don’t you forget that…” Mammon continued.   
I smiled at him, “Thank you Mammon. I appreciate that.   
“…And if I can’t manage to save ya, then make sure you die, got it?! I don’t want no one else steppin’ in and savin’ you, all right? It’s me or no one, understand?! ” Mammon said in the most tsundere way I have ever heard.   
I started laughing, it was too cute.   
“Oi, I’m serious!” Mammon snapped.   
“That’s so sweet of you Mammon.” I replied. I mean not the part about me dying, but the sentiment was there.   
“Ya’know…because its my JOB. Don’t read into it” Mammon said as he finished the wrapping.   
I kissed his cheek and he blushed furiously.   
Then I heard my D.D.D. ringing. It was Levi, he asked me to meet him in the planetarium.  
I grabbed my slice of pizza and ate it on my way there, with the worried Mammon who did not want me to face Levi alone.  
“Mammon, let me speak with him alone, if you are worried, stay withing ear shot.” I said.  
“I ain’t worried. Its my job to keep ya’ safe. I can’t let Levi kill ya’ after Lucifer saved you!” Mammon explained.   
I sighed, “I want to speak with him alone.”  
“Alright, but I’ll be near, not because I’m worried, but for you. Ya’ know, you are so weak and all. If something happened to ya’ I would get in trouble too.” Mammon replied.   
I nodded and walked into the Planetarim.   
Leviathan began to rant as soon as I walked in“… Finally, I’ve been waiting for you to show up. It took you long enough. When I call for you, you need to come right away, understand? Don’t walk, run. I want you moving at light speed. Like the way Henry races over whenever his best friend the Lord of Shadows calls on him. You saw the TSP DVDs, so you should know. He comes riding up on the winged unicorn that he won off the Lord of Fools in a bet.”  
I stared at him expectantly. “Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying you and I are best friends or anything. As if” Leviathan said noting the look on my face. “So, do you know why I called you here?”  
“Okay… so we aren’t best friends, that’s fine, but let’s be friends?” I said with a hopeful smile on my face.   
Leviathan blushed furiously., “What?! Did you say friends? You and me…? A-A-Are you.. are you out of your mind?! You do know I tried to attack you, right? And that if Lucifer hadn’t intervened, you’d be dead right now. You realize that, right? I mean, that literally JUST happened. Have you already forgotten, or are you that dumb? Do you have the memory of a goldfish or something or maybe you’ve got amnesia? Also… let’s be friends? Serious? What are you, five years old? Who actually walks up to somebody and ask something like that?! Could you Be any lamer?! You’re unbelievable!”  
I giggled, “First of all, you are rambling Leviathan, second, never talk about Amnesia, I didn’t like that anime. Also, I totally pushed your buttons, I triggered you, that’s on me. Lucifer did interfere but, regardless, you still didn’t kill me. And I DO want to get to know you. You are fascinating. I would like someone to talk video games and anime with. Who better than you? And I am asking because I am not forcing you.”  
Leviathan stayed quiet for a moment, “All right, look. Here’s the thing. You remember why we decided to have that competition in the first place, right? It was to see who the bigger TSL fan was and I told you that if you won, I’d enter into a pact with you. That little trump card you pulled out was a real dirty trick…but a promise is a promise, after all. It really kills me to do this… it makes my stomach churn. But, I’ll keep my end of the bargain. I’ll do it. I’ll make a pact with you.” Then he smiled.   
I smiled and hugged him, “Thank you!”  
Leviathan pushed me away, “Touchy touchy no no.”   
I giggled.   
Leviathan took a deep breath, “I am Leviathan, Avatar of Envy. I pledge myself to you, Valentina… that we may be bound by an unbreakable pact. This I swear to you on both my name as well as the very blood that runs through my veins.”  
“I, Valentina accept this pact from you, Leviathan, Avatar of Envy.” I said this and I felt the picking sensation on my right shoulder blade.   
“…so, what’s all this about anyway? There’s something you’re not telling me, isn’t there? A normie human like you asking to make a pact with a demon like me? You must have some sort of ulterior motive. Go on, spill the beans.” Leviathan said knowingly.   
I felt a pang of guilt, I was aware that he was insecure, “I mean, yes and no. I really want to be friends, but all of this is literally because I wanted to borrow your TSL soundtrack.”  
“AHA! I knew it! I knew no one would actually WANT a pact with me. Not like this is surprising or anything.” Leviathan said.   
“NO! Fuck Levi, listen, I could have just said the deal was if I won you would let me borrow the TSL soundtrack, but I didn’t. I asked for a pact because I DO want to ACTUALLY be in a pact with you. And I didn’t even force you into letting me borrow it. I am asking to borrow it. I am not even using the pact. Just like I asked to be friends, I could make you do what I want, but I’m not like that.” I replied.   
We made our way to Levi’s room, Mammon was nowhere to be seen, I figured he realized there was no danger. As we walked into Leviathan’s room I smirked noticing the opened box of half eaten pizza.   
He grabbed the record, “Well, I don’t know what you’re planning on doing with my record, but… just don’t sell it, understand? You’d better give it back when you’re done, is that clear? If you touch it, make sure to wipe off any fingerprints. And no eating potato chips and stuff when you handle it. It’s super super rare, so you’d better not lose any of the inserts or the sleeve or anything!” Then he handed it to me.   
“Thank you, Levi, I promise, I won’t sell it and it will be treated with the respect it deserves.” I said with a smile and left his room.  
I went to Lucifer’s door and I knocked.   
“The door’s open. Come in.” Lucifer said.   
I let myself in and Lucifer was standing in front of the door, it seems he had been working with some papers on his desk.   
Lucifer smiled “Ah, Valentina, it’s you. Today really was quite a disaster, wasn’t it?” Then he frowned, “But despite all that happened, you should know that Levi’s not normally like that. He may be a high-ranking demon, but he’s quite harmless by nature. Try not to hold it against him.”  
I smiled, “I won’t. Besides, it was totally my fault he blew up like that, I had to be extra, put on a show, rub it in his face. The truth is I was trying to trigger him. That is on me and I am sorry. I took steps to clear the air between me and Leviathan and I think things will get better.”  
Then he smiled, “I am glad to hear that, so, tell me, what brings you here at this hour?”  
“Actually, I was told you might be interested in this,” I showed him the vinyl,   
“Wh…! Is this what I think it is?!” Lucifer looked shocked.   
“Just, you know, it’s Levi’s so be kind to it. He expects it back in perfect conditions, no fingerprints and no eating chips around it.” I said sternly.   
Lucifer then gave me that smile that made me feel known.“…Ah, now I get it. So, this is why you wanted to make a pact with Levi.” Then he looked at me sternly, “Do you realize what it is you’ve got here, what this represents?”  
I shook my head. “No, I don’t but Levi said it was super super rare.”  
Lucifer smirked, “I don’t imagine you would. This isn’t any ordinary soundtrack, you see. There’s quite a history to it. I don’t have any particular interest in The Tale of the Seven Lords as a story, No… what interests me is the person who served as the first composer for the TSL movies. You see, the composer I speak of is dead now. He killed himself”   
“Why are you telling me this with a smile on your face?” I questioned.  
Lucifer turned serious, “The final song he wrote before his death was meant to be used in the scene where the Lord of Corruption puts a curse on the heroes.”  
“Ah, the one that’s based on you. Got it.” I said.   
Lucifer ignored me and frowned. “But due to the composer committing suicide, they decided not to use that track. They saved it, it didn’t release it to the public. However, a group of diehard fans pooled their own funds and had a very limited number of vinyl editions produced. As you might have guessed by now, this record is one of the few that were created.”  
“So, Levi was probably involved in that too?” I commented  
Lucifer continued his explanation, “However, all the people involved in its creation, as well as every single person who owned a copy of it, ended up dying mysteriously.” Ah, so Levi had nothing to do with it. “So, people started saying the record itself was cursed. I heard all these had been destroyed. But all this time, Levi has had a copy. I had no idea. All right, I’ll go ahead and take this. We’ll consider it payment for saving you earlier.”  
“No, you can’t keep it. You are borrowing it from Leviathan.” I cautioned.   
He ignored me, “Still I really appreciate you bringing this to me. I think I’ll spend tonight savoring every last note of this music here.” Then his expression changed to something that made even my bones shiver like he was challenging, but his look held a sort of threat or promise. “which means I probably won’t be able to bring myself to leave my room tonight.” He was literally telling me to go up the stairs, “You see, we demons can’t resist temptation. When there’s something we really want staring us in the face, we have to have it. That’s simple how we are. Right now what I want is to stay up all night listening to this record. I can’t help it… I have to do it. But don’t think that means you’re free to climb the stairs to the attic, Valentina. That place is off-limits.”  
“Shit, Lucifer, do you have like a sex dungeon up there? I’m not interested in your weird kinks!” I mused.   
Lucifer chuckled, “Well then, good night.”  
I sighed, “Good night, Lucifer, enjoy the soundtrack and please return it to Levi.”  
I walked out and basically dashed to the stairs to the attic. As I neared the stairs I heard the voice calling my name, “Valentina, no one is going to stop you. Now’s your chance to climb the stairs. Come… this way, Valentina.”


End file.
